We all experience anger at some stage in our lives. Maybe it's even a daily occurrence for you. Either way, you've searched for this article because you want to learn how to control your anger. The anger management techniques I'm going to share with you really do work! Like you, I'm an ordinary person who just wanted to get a handle on things and not feel angry all the time. I'm not a psychologist, I'm in fact a lawyer, and in my lifetime I've had many difficult life experiences that have generated varying degrees of anger. Now I'm focused on getting to my happy place, just like millions of fellow human beings.
So here goes:
1. WALK AWAY: This is one of the most powerful anger management techniques, and it does work. I'd also recommend that before you walk away, you tell the other person/people that you need to leave the room to calm down and you will be back to discuss the matter calmly. In doing this, your departure is not abrupt and won't create a new cause of tension.
2. TAKE A FEW DEEP BREATHS: There must be a biological reason why this works, because it really does. In yoga and meditation, breathing is used to co-ordinate the flow of energy and create a feeling of calm. Also taking deep breaths allows you to take more oxygen in this stimulates brain activity. In other words, it helps you to think straight.
3. BE AWARE OF THE WAY YOU SPEAK: All too often when we have completed steps 1 & 2, we immediately negate the beneficial effects of those two steps by telling ourselves things like " I'm so LIVID!" or "I'm STUNNED at what s/he just said!". This type of language will keep us trapped in the web of anger. The internal language we use is so crucial in anger management, and if we deliberately choose words that are going to calm us down then the benefits will be enormous. Instead try saying "I'm proud that I left the room, because now I know things will start to calm down." Or you could try saying "This too will pass", while you take your deep breaths.
4. KNOW THAT ANGER IS A MASK: Anger does not stand alone as an emotion, and anger management techniques are only one part of the solution. Anger is often a mask for unexpressed or suppressed fear, hurt, unhappiness or pain. Ask yourself why the situation you're in has created the angry reaction? What pain are you hiding? Is there an unmet need that you are afraid to express for fear of rejection? Identify what has caused the anger and you will then be able to deal with the root of the issue.
5. SAY "THIS TOO WILL PASS": This is a powerful anger management technique and it allows you to get past the immediate anger and look forward to a happier future.
So there you have my 5 easy anger management techniques. I believe the purpose of life is to experience all of life, not to get stuck in one moment of it. We cannot pick only positive, fun experiences to have in our lives, we must take the rough with the smooth. So when the not-so-positive comes along, you'll be able to apply these 5 techniques and look forward to focussing on the good experiences. I've also got this great anger management program which will help you even more.
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